Erik Blomgren
- Describe how you want to experience your next performance. Imagine walking on stage: How do you want to feel physically? What kinds of thoughts do you want to be having? What emotions do you want to experience?
I want my next performance experience to feel flawless. No nerves, no stress, just pure, relaxed, unrestrained performance. The only thoughts I want to have are about the music, and about enjoying the performance. I find I put on my best performances when I am relaxed and happy. Generally, most of the negativity I carry with me onto the stage comes from outside stressors, so this is unlikely to happen until after I’m graduated. The only emotional response I would like to have is that which I have tied to the music. This kind of unrestrained and direct connection to my music has only happened in performance a few times for me, but each experience has been absolutely unforgettable. I live for it.
- How would you like to come across to your audience? What image do you want to convey through your stage entrances, exits, and bows?
I would like to come across as calm and collected, but passionate about the material I’m putting forward. Sincerity and gratitude are two of the most important qualities to have as a performer and I think I would like to portray those to the audience above all else. I generally like to avoid any extra flair or dramatism with my entrances and exits, although that is mostly for classical shows. For more energized performances, I want my characterization to be enthused and pumped from the second I walk onto the stage. There should be no question in the audience’s head that I would rather be anywhere than performing right there in front of them.
- Have you recently videotaped a performance and later watched it with a mentor to discuss your stage presence? If not, when might you be able to do this?
I have not taken this opportunity with any recent performances and have generally only done this for my extracurricular shows, as I find I care more about my stage presence for these types of events. It’s been a minute but I would imagine I would probably be disappointed by my presence at some of my more recent classical shows. I might have this opportunity at the next Wind Ensemble concert this Friday, and I would likely be well suited to practice this skill at the concert as I am liable to be tired and unenthused to be there. I don’t know when I might be able to review it with a mentor, but I am confident in my ability to recognize and critique my mistakes, in this avenue at least.
- How do you experience
performance anxiety? Describe your specific symptoms:
- Physical
I generally get faster breathing and heartrate, accompanied by heightened energy levels and just feeling generally dehydrated. I occasionally also get my thoughts jumbled and experience generalized anxiety symptoms but this is uncommon for me and likely related more to stress and anxiety in general.
- thought patterns (self-talk)
I sometimes find I catch myself talking negatively to myself, so I just have to work to break these patterns before any kind of performance, especially after I make mistakes. Sometimes when I mess up, my mind starts racing and I have to calm myself back down so that I can focus and play with the kind of confidence that I need.
- Feelings
I sometimes begin to feel overwhelmed, and get that sensation of pressure building behind the bridge of my nose. I can also become irritable if I feel extra anxious/stressed, though I’m pretty good at avoiding that. I generally get little to no performance anxiety at this point in my life (I’ve performed literally hundreds of times, eventually ya get used to it) and am only really affected when performing on a new or unfamiliar instrument, or in a new setting (like theater, opera, etc.).
- Of the interventions described for handling anxiety in this chapter, which do you plan to work on?
I plan to focus most on taking care of myself and working on pacing and breathing. I’ve recently begun working on meditation and breathing exercises are an important part of that process among other things. Pacing is also something that I have trouble with, especially under pressure, so this would be very important for me to develop and work on down the road.
- Have you ever experienced discomfort during or after practice? What have you done as a result of feeling this discomfort?
On occasion I’ve had issues with tension in my upper body, particularly in my shoulders and neck. This has generally been the result of strain and pressure on my muscles due to fatigue and overuse. This used to be a major problem for me into my junior year here, and it’s something that I had to overcome with lots of conscious thought and mental effort. I spent a good couple weeks just playing long tones and working on my range while trying to relax all of my neck and upper body to help counteract this. It’s still something I have to be conscious of, especially when I’m sore.
- How often do you take breaks during practice sessions? How long are these breaks? What do you do during these breaks?
When practicing for long periods of time I usually take breaks roughly every 20 minutes or so. In a consistent practice session these breaks will generally be around 10 minutes (half the time spent practicing is what I will do regularly) and I will spend that time usually taking a break and listening to the music or occupying my time otherwise (usually the latter). This of course all depends on the amount of practicing I need to get done, and the amount of time I have available to me (if I really need to work something up and I only have an hour available on a day I might not take breaks).
- To help ensure a lifetime of healthy music making, what else (beyond taking breaks) can you do to help safeguard your performance health?
Mostly I think I could work on maintaining my health in general. I do a fantastic job of taking care of my body as far as eating and exercise habits go, but I am heavily prone to risk-taking and thrill-seeking, which are not necessarily conducive to a career devoid of injury. I probably shouldn’t aggressively pursue boxing, for example, as that has many negative effects that could impede my playing in the long term.
